As much as we think it’s important to talk about, even shout about, sexual wellness, we know that you don’t want the whole house knowing when you’re taking your well-deserved me-time with your vibe. Everyone knows that distinctive ‘bzzzz’ sound, and the last thing you want to be thinking about while you’re taking care of you needs is: ‘can my mum hear what I’m doing?’
You don’t need that kind of awkward stress in your life, especially when you’re suppose to be relaxing. So, to help you carry on doing you – no pun – we’ve rounded up five silent vibrators that your mum will never hear.
Smile Makers The Surfer
This small but mighty clitoral vibrator is not only ideal for taking on your travels, it also only makes a teeny-weeny sound of 40dB. For refence, a quick Google search told me that 40dB is about the sound level of background noise in a library. Pretty quiet if you obeyed by library rules. The Surfer also has three speeds and one pulsation mode to enjoy in almost silence.
Lelo Sona Pink
The Lelo Sona Pink is not your conventional vibrator. The toy is designed to stimulate the clitoris, but not just the external clitoris, the whole clitoris, even the bits you can’t see in the mirror. Lemme tell you, that’s a lot of clitoris. Using sonic waves and pulses instead of conventional vibrations, the Sona Pink has a maximum sound of 50dB; that’s about the sound of background noise in your house. Those sonic waves will just blend into the background.
My Viv Pebble Personal Massager
The My Viv Pebble Personal Massager is a pocket rocket without the dramatic blast off (but definitely with the blast off feeling.) Designed for external stimulation, the vibrator is the ideal pal for people who find penetration uncomfortable or prefer external pleasure. But, of course, it wouldn’t have made the list if it weren’t super quiet; the palm sized vibrator makes less noise than a mobile vibrating! Just say you were on a good news call.
Smile Makers The Tennis Pro
Let’s be honest, if you own The Tennis Pro, you’re going to find preeeetty hard to stay quiet. With four speeds and two pulsation modes, the G-spot stimulating vibrator is going to definitely test your ability to keep your appreciation subdued. Regardless, the vibrator is perfectly discreet with a maximum noise level of 40dB and can be used in water; you know just in case you don’t have a lock on your bedroom door.
Lelo Soraya 2
Offering dual stimulation to both the clitoris and the G-spot, the Soraya 2 is the ultimate buy for boujee babes that wanna keep their extravagant self-care uber quiet. The vibrator has a flexible external stimulator to adapt to your body, and a sculpted tip for enhanced internal pleasure; and yup, it’s only 50bD. Your fridge makes more noise that this!
Self Love Massage Wand
This vibrator may look like a microphone, but Self Love’s Massage Wand will give you plenty to be (quietly) singing about. The vibrating massage wand features eight vibrations and three intensity levels to help you find the best vibe for you, and it goes without saying at this point, but the Massage Wand is so quiet that you’ll definitely feel it before you can hear it.
Naked Grapefruit First Base
You can always reply on a bullet vibrator to be discreet and quiet, and Naked Grapefruit’s First Base is no different. The small but mighty vibrator features seven speed settings to help you find your intensity and it suuuuuper quiet. The teeny tiny vibrator is also the ideal travel partner so you can get your vibe on anywhere and everywhere.
Unbound Bean
In the world of sexual wellness, the quiet ones always seem to be the mightiest. Unbound’s Bean is the discreet clitoral vibrator that could be easily confused with a skincare tool; you know if anyone ever goes rooting in your bedside drawer and you need a quick excuse. The palm-sized vibrator is designed for use around the clitoris and has six super quiet vibration patterns that will work their hardest to make you… not quiet.
Vush Rose 2
Easily one of the prettiest vibrators in your collection, Vush’s Rose 2 is the one for upping your self-care game with serious flair. The bullet vibrator is soft, flexible, and has five precision points which bend and flex with your body so you can find what works for you. With five patterns and five intensity level, the vibrator is the one you need for quiet, discreet, but boujie vibing.