While sex education may be so much better than it once was, it still leaves a lot to be desired. If your sex ed classes are anything like mine were, then you learn the basics about the birds and the bees, how to put a condom on, that everyone should be on the contraceptive pill, and something about the STIs you may or may not get.
Beyond that, you actually learn hardly anything. There’s no talking about sexuality, how your sex drive fluctuates, self-pleasure, vibrators, or anything in between. But we believe talking about sex is important and if you’re ready to start sexually exploring, you might want to expand your knowledge and learn a thing or two.
Here are our important sex ed topics that you wish you’d learned at school.
1) You Set Your Own Boundaries
We all look at our sexual wellness in different ways. What one person likes might be a step too far for another person, or there may be people who are up for exploring anything and everything.
It’s important you set your own boundaries about what you do or don’t like and don’t let anyone persuade you otherwise. On the flip side, it’s also crucial that you respect other people’s sexual boundaries, whatever they may be. This, of course, applies to consent too. No means no, and don’t ever be afraid to stand by that.
2) There's More Than Just The Contraceptive Pill Out There
The likelihood is that at school, you were taught about condoms or hormonal contraceptives like the pill, and not a lot else. While the pill is an effective method for many, it doesn’t work for some. The good news is, it’s not the only contraceptive method.
There are 15+ other options available — condoms, implants, IUDs, injections, and natural methods, such as period tracker apps. Sometimes, the pill helps with heavy periods, whereas other times, people may experience poor mental health and bad skin as a result. Our advice? Do your research and weigh up the pros and cons to decide which route to take.
3) LGBTQ+ Relationships
More often than not, the sex education curriculum mainly focuses on heterosexual relationships, which is a very inaccurate picture of the world we live in today. Not teaching a class about every type of sex, relationship, sexual orientation, and pleasure only leads to feelings of confusion and marginalisation.
4) Exploring Your Sexuality
Similarly to the last important sex ed topic, schools teach us very little about exploring your sexuality or gender identity. You should be able to follow your feelings and sexual preferences, whatever they may be. If you feel comfortable, it’s important to be as open as possible and share where you’re at. Hiding who you truly are or what you believe isn’t the best way to live your life.
5) Anything About Self-Pleasure
For me, sex education classes went something like this — a man meets a woman, they have sex, he orgasms, the end. Although masturbation might be mentioned in passing, it’s certainly not a focus, and it’s usually only approached from a male POV. In reality, self-pleasure is a huge part of our sex lives, so it seems crazy that you’re not given an open forum to discuss such an important topic. If you’re ready to start exploring sexually, then you might want to read the next point…
6) Vibrators Aren't Embarrassing
Whether you’re new to the vibrator life, are still a rookie, or are a fully-fledged supporter, vibrators are an important part of many people’s sexual wellness routines. But were they ever discussed in sex education? No. There are countless benefits of self-pleasure and orgasms, from increased mood and lowered cortisol to glowing skin and boosted body confidence, all of which should be taught in school. Ready to join the vibrator hype? Add these to your haul.
7) Periods Aren't Something To Be Ashamed Of
We’ve all been there — hiding your sanitary pad up your sleeve as you make a dash for the bathroom and hope no one will notice you’re on your — shhh, don’t say it — period. Newsflash: life’s too short. Periods are normal. They’re not dirty, they’re completely natural. You shouldn’t be ashamed of them. You don’t need to hide your tampons and sex education classes should teach you that. If there’s just one thing you take away from this article, make it this.
8) There Are Countless Different Ways To Have An Orgasm
Anyone can orgasm, no matter your gender, sexuality, or sex drive. And guess what? You can achieve them in many other ways other than sexual penetration. While sex is the go-to for many people, you can just as easily reach orgasm by using a vibrator, butt plug, masturbation, or even just by passionately kissing. Find what works for you and trust us, you’ll never look back.
9) Everybody Is Different
In sex education, you were probably shown textbook pictures (quite literally) of genitalia, body types, and sex position. The reality is, everyone comes in different shapes, sizes, colours, and textures. Everybody is different and their sexual preferences might be too. What’s the case for one person might not be for the other. Don’t judge and don’t worry about being judged!
10) Lube Goes Hand In Hand With Sexual Pleasure
If you ask us, lube is essential in our sexual wellness lineup. Very little was said about lube during sex education and some people even make it out to be something that shouldn’t be needed. Believe us when we tell you that lube will level up your sexual pleasure game. Whether you’re using it with a partner, vibrator, or toy, lubes make everything much more comfortable sexually and literally everyone uses them. Don’t miss out on the hype!